My FAILxercise Experiences!

[Contest entry]

This, is me.

domo1Chubby and bespectacled me.

I’ve been horizontally challenged all my life and do you know how many nicknames have been given to me? Elephant, godzilla, giant, and the likes. It’s never fun being fat but life’s like that. So I decided to do something to get rid of the fats.

I’ve done so many things and all seem to fail. The first and obvious one? Exercising.

I was in my primary and secondary school TAF club program. We did alot of running, skipping, etc. Even now and then, I try to go jogging.

(click to enlarge images please!)run!

I jogged alright. All those 1.6km, 2.4km and 5km runs/jogged/sometimes walk (HEHEHE) I did for how many years..I stayed the same. I even tried those exercise parks since they are nearby my house.

pushh

Push, I did. Push with all my might, hoping to burn some fats away…

armsersize

And swing I did. Swinging with all my might. After all these running, pushing, swinging, this is how I end up.

zzzz

Crashed at a playground and snoozed. Oh the body ache! So I never went back to running and all that. -_-”

Then I tried dieting. You know, less carbs, more veggies and stuff? Oh yeah. I cut down on rice and carbs, upped the intake of veggies and fruits and meat.

veggie diet

Nummy nummy. Lol I look ridiculous.

Anyway, the diet went well…for a week. Ironically, it made me more hungry and I’m sick of veggies and meat only. I gave up and dived for my snacks. Oh yummy yummy snacks!

eatingtv

Oh cadbury. Oh popcorn. Oh waffle cereal. Why do you guys taste so good? This isn’t the deal but you guys are such good food.

Hah. Even dieting failed.

Getting desperate, I turned to slimming pills.

When I was in Sec 2, I tried Herbalife. The milkshake food replacement taste great, but it could never last long. My stomach felt empty and sad. LOL. Then few months back, my friend who was getting married, introduced a slimming jamu (malay traditional pill) to me. She tried and it sort of works for her.

jamu

But by golly, the moment I opened the bottle..the smell almost knocked me out. It was awful. The smell was like, a cross of dirty gym socks and..rotten eggs? I don’t know. Worst thing is, I had to gulp down 6 pills per intake!

I still tried it anyway, for a few days. It made me poo a lot. Pooing a lot is not fun, so I stopped taking pills and..

pillsinthebin

dumped them in the rubbish bin where they belong. Remember, it’s not good to take too much slimming pills because you may never know what the side effects are.

Bleah. So many attempts to slim down. Exercising, dieting, pills. I think I need a personal trainer, but that costs alot of money. I swear playing bowling or tennis and even boxing on wii makes me sweat even more than running does.

There’s still one thing I haven’t tried though, and it’s this nifty technology called Cavitation, by Cenosis.

If you haven’t learnt Biology, our fat cells look like this:

Pink and fluffy looking, like little bunnies. BUT NO, these things are bad. I hate them, you hate them, everyone hates them. So what cavitation does is that, it uses stable cavitation to break the fat cells membrane through the bursting of micro-bubbles.

Thus, the complex fatty acids are broken down into simpler fatty acids. These simple fatty acids then make their way out of our butts and into the toilet bowl. *lol*

To make it clearer, this diagram explains it all.

process

Sounds interesting, ain’t it? Rest assured, Cenosis is qualified to use the Cavitation Technlogy, spending years in research to ensure the safety of their customers while showing proven results. They certainly are licensed to kill! Kill those fats away, of course!

Look at the results! This is a great way to slim down. Running & dieting can wait again. Cavitation can melt my fats away and you can try it now! There’s a special price for me and you! Yay for the slimmer & more confident you and me!

Even if I don’t fully slim down, I still can have a drop in clothes size, after all those fats are melted and pooped out of my system after cavitation. Shopping shopping shopping for clothes! Shopping makes me a happy girl.

So why wait?

Make an appointment with Cenosis right now, to find out how you can benefit from this wonderful technology at a special price of $33. Call 7000 700 6626 or visit www.cenosis.biz/cavitation.php to make an appointment.

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5 Comments»

  Jas wrote @

hi there, u’ve got an interesting post on the failed attempt. I liked this post a lot. haha..

  Jurlique wrote @

Oh why thank you! LOL

  MC wrote @

Thumbs up! ^^
Congrats to you :)

  Jurlique wrote @

THANKS HAHHA :D


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